Meet Tanya and Chloe. I met them on Bonaire Island in the Dutch Antilles. Very interesting pair. I think they were an item, whatever that means in the world of mermaids.
Not that it was in any way a problem for me. I have no LGBTQ+ issues.
Chloe tried to explain the way mermaids view the boy/girl thing we topsiders seem to be so pre-occupied with.
“You topsiders sure invest a lot of time and energy …”
Tanya interjected, “And money!”
“… yes, money too, in the whole male-female thing.”
I shrugged and probably looked puzzled. “It’s pretty fundamental for us.”
She swiveled the stool she was sitting in to face me, then stretched her body out. “What do you see? Can you tell if I’m male or female?”
“You have breasts.”
“So do sumo wrestlers. What about down below?”
She was right, of course. No obvious signs one way or other.
“And if you were to meet all two million or so of us, that’s what you’d see.”
“There’s two million mermaids in the world?”
“Give or take ten thousand or so. No one knows for sure. The oceans are enormous!”
“You’re really blowing my mind!”
Admittedly, that was a gross understatement. Every time I met a mermaid, my mind was getting blown. I’m surprised I can think at all.
Do you want to hear more about my unique adventures? How about having your own copy?
As I mentioned before, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available for a limited time (until December 2nd) for 25% off the regular price . . . order it directly from the printer.
By the way, this stunning fantasy/travel/cookbook is also available as an ebook, in the format of your choice . . .
You can still get a super high-quality deluxe full-color copy of “Mermaids” for 25% off the regular price. Order it for only $29.95, DIRECTLY FROM THE PRINTER . . . HERE.
This is easily one of the most beautiful books you’ll ever own! Full color cover-to-cover, the highest quality paper.
Here are some sample pages . . .
For a preview of the unbelievable story behind this book, click HERE;
Of course, this unique book has been in development for seven years. Along the way, word of it has leaked and created an initial undercurrent of “buzz”. Now that the project is finally coming to fruition — official publication date is November 2nd — speculation is building and interest is snowballing.
Even the mermaids have weighed in!
“John did a good job on this book — for a topsider. I have to say this because from what I know about them, what I’ve seen on TV and movies, they’re usually a pretty strange bunch. But John has a good sense of humor, takes criticism well, and has an open, curious mind. And he closes his mouth when he chews.” – Syn, a mermaid who lives in the South China Sea.
“My contact with dry humans — we mermaids DO consider ourselves human — has been very limited. Sometimes someone falls overboard. Or gets swept out to sea in a strong current. Dry humans seem to be pretty lousy swimmers. Oh … and when I’m topside and order take-out, I get a glimpse of the delivery boy, or man, or girl. Whatever. Other than that, this John guy is it. He’s certainly the only one who’ve I’ve sat in a room with and been in close proximity to. He smells very flowery. Strong stuff! Cologne? Underarm deodorant? Why do dry humans dowse themselves with all these stinky chemicals?” – Claudia, a mermaid who lives in the South Pacific Ocean.
“Since meeting John Rachel, I’ve read some of his books. Crazy guy! But fun to read. We hit it off pretty good. He looks kind of old, though. I don’t get it. He’s what? 60 or 70? Last time I checked, I’m over 750-years-old. I don’t have any wrinkles at all.” – Cassandra, a mermaid who lives the Bay of Bengal and Indian Ocean.
“This writer guy, John, kept apologizing for asking stupid questions and saying stupid things. I thought he was just being funny. But there’s no reason for him to be embarrassed. I mean, EVERYTHING is different under water. I certainly have no need for a hair drier and ballpoint pens are pretty worthless. Ever try to lick a stamp at the bottom of a swimming pool? I like this book, What Do Mermaids Eat? Except the copy I took home with me only took three days to pretty much dissolve. Maybe I need a waterproof Kindle reader.” – Deehl, a mermaid who lives in the chilly waters of the Tasman Sea.
“When John talked about us in his book, he said we seemed to be an ‘item’. It took us a while to figure out what he meant. Honestly, we don’t have all these categories for love. We’re all just sisters down here. We love every mermaid we meet with the same intensity, sincerity, and passion. There’s no jealousy or competition. Maybe topsiders need to change the way they look at others. It works for us. Ever seen a sad or angry mermaid?” – Tanya and Chloe, two mermaids who live in the Caribbean Sea.
And at least one very special guest, who never heard of me, gave the book a nod.
“I haven’t read this book. I’m very busy.” – Stephen King, author of hundreds of best sellers, a very rich, eccentric as hell, but a lovable guy.
I don’t mean to be a broken record. Or a self-replicating binary glitch. But again I remind those folks who are keen for a bargain, pride themselves on the highest standards, and have an eye out for the truly beautiful: the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available pre-publication for a limited time (until November 2nd) for 25% off the regular price. We have here a genuinely stunning version of the book which you will be proud to show your friends or put on display in your living room or den.
I met Marta in Ponce, Puerto Rico. She feared being captured by us topsiders and forced to jump through flaming hoops at Sea World. Besides, she hated chlorinated water. She told me that mermaids have a favorite movie about us humans. It’s Planet of the Apes.
What a funny gal! Check out this exchange . . .
Me: “Can you cry underwater?”
Marta: “Can you blow bubbles at 30,000 feet?”
Me: “How can you tell when your laundry is dry?”
Marta: “How do you know for sure that you’re not inside out?”
I can’t improve on that. I don’t know what to say.
Just a reminder, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available for a limited time (until December 2nd) for 25% off the regular price.
Cassandra: “First of all, none of us keep track of age. It usually doesn’t even occur to us. But at some point — I don’t remember why — I started counting. So I can give you that number. 735.”
Me: “735? 735 years old? Why I wouldn’t have pegged you as being a day over 600.”
Cassandra: “We’re probably immortal. But we don’t think about that either. We live in the moment. Less stress that way.”
Me: “I’m trying to wrap head around this. No anti-aging crème? Hormone replacement therapy? No Botox? Vitamin supplements?”
Cassandra: “None of the above.”
Me: “Cosmetic surgery is probably out of the question.”
Cassandra: “We keep healthy by staying active.”
Me: “Of course! Swimming is supposed to be very good exercise.”
I try to have good variety in my friendships. I like having younger friends and older friends. Now I had one that was at least 735-years-old! How many of you can say that?
By the way, as I mentioned before, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available pre-publication for a limited time (until December 2nd) for 25% off the regular price.
I admit that when I met Rahqa, I was surprised — a little shocked — seeing all of her MUSCLES and TATTOOS!
She was definitely unique.
But beyond being a health addict and alt-cultural, Rahqa was an activist, very concerned and upset about the way humans are treating the oceans.
Rahqa: “Did you know there’s an island of plastic garbage the size of Texas floating in the middle of the Pacific Ocean.”
Me: “That sounds bad.”
Rahqa: “Don’t get daffy on me now.”
Me: “Actually, I do know that but it’s not something I think about.”
Rahqa: “Well, please start. And tell your friends. Stop with all the plastic!”
Yes, she was fiery and beautiful! And a damn good cook. For our dinner, she whipped up Fruit of the Isles Sesame Crusted Mahi Mahi in Pineapple Sauce. I even included the recipe!
As I mentioned before, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available for a limited time (until December 2nd) for 25% off the regular price.
Meet Corinne. Read all about her and 18 other mermaids in the most uniquely beautiful fantasy/travel/cookbook ever!
When I met Corinne, I noticed that the left side of her body seemed weak, almost limp. She noticed me noticing.
Corinne: “You’re probably wondering about this. I got broadsided by a nuclear submarine.”
Me: “I’m sorry.”
Corinne: “Well, it wasn’t your fault. Then again. It was American. You don’t happen to drive a submarine, do you?”
And so it went. Every mermaid had unique and astonishing stories. And they all had a lot to say about we land-based humans, out gadgets, our movies, our celebrities, our music, our way of life and priorities. To say it was both entertaining and fascinating would be a gross understatement.
By the way, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available pre-publication for a limited time (until November 2nd) for 25% off the regular price. Go HERE for details! Or order it now directly from the printer.
The organization that interviewed me was the Sasayama International Center of Understanding, aka Kokusai Rikai 日本国際理解教育学会.
This is a non-profit and my connection with them goes all the way back to 2008. I taught English there three times a week for the entire year. The people there are wonderful and we’ve kept in touch.
They have a host of wonderful programs and activities, all dedicated to promoting knowledge and appreciation of other cultures. We have a variety of people from other countries here in Tambasasayama, including Peru, Brazil, Vietnam, South Korea, Philippines, even African nations like Senegal, and of course, the United States (like me!). Japanese language courses are made available to the immigrants, and English is taught to local Japanese who wish to build on the basic skills they got in elementary and high school. That was where I came in.
By the way, here is the message featured at the top of the home page for the organization:
戦争は人の心の中で生れるものであるから, 人の心の中に平和のとりでを築かなければならない。Since wars begin in the minds of men, it is in the minds of men that the defences of peace must be constructed. — Preamble of the UNESCO Constitution
In any case, one of my students from all the way back in 2008 who I’ve kept in touch with — she’s into organic farming, sustainable agriculture, and during her high school years was an exchange student somewhere in Florida — recently took a job at Kokusai Rikai. She alerted them to my Live From Japan! book. Next thing I know, I’m getting interviewed for a monthly publication they do (pictured on the left).
I thought the interview went well. It certainly was fun!
They asked me what page people should visit first. Without a doubt, The Naked American! Then they wanted to know my favorite story. That would be “There is beauty everywhere!” Finally, they wanted to know what my three favorite things were here in Tambasasayama.
My wife.
Riding my bike all around town.
The beauty of Tambasasayama — the mountains, shrines, temples, rice and bean fields.
Here is the interview. It helps if you can read Japanese . . .
Indeed . . . it’s like living in a fairy tale!
By the way, if you’re interested in the book, in addition to the stories about living here in Japan, there are over 450 photos . . .
I suspect most people share my fascination. I’ve always had a thing for the sky. When I was a boy, I had a refractor telescope and spent hours looking at stars, planets, the moon. During the day — this will bring back some childhood memories for many folks — my friends and I would lie on a blanket, looking for “special” shapes in the clouds: animals, faces, things of religious significance (I was a completely brainwashed Catholic back then).
Clouds! What a gift! What a wonder!
Not all of the time but often enough, we have some truly majestic skies here in my hometown. Yesterday was just such a day. My bike ride was especially splendid.
I’m sure it helps that Tambasasayama is far from any congested, urban area. Though I have to say, compared with, for example, Los Angeles — I lived there for 15 years — the skies over Osaka, Kyoto and Kobe are pristine.
Anyway, only two hours after these photos were taken, here’s what we got . . .
Did I ever mention how crazy the weather is here? Granted, we don’t get snow in the summer, but just about everything else rolls around, alternating from clear skies to lightning, thunder, light rain, heavy rain, wild windy storms, back to clear skies, beautiful clouds.
It rained for about 40 minutes. Then an hour after that, it looked like this . . .
Could it be much more unpredictable? Shifting? Whimsical?
Returning to clouds. They sure carry a variety of messages, encourage some wild imaginings, evoke a range of reactions and sentiments. I know someone who said it best! One of my all-time favorite artists/singer/songwriters!
Five years ago, I posted an article about our local castle and its surrounding grounds. The castle has a moat, of little use now that it’s been over 600 years since the Mongols invaded Japan. These days, it serves as a playground for ducks and turtles, and of course, a reminder of the military history of our town. Tiny as it was, the castle was used by various samurai as they defended their territorial claims to Sasayama.
I described in that previous article how an area elementary school was using the moat for a school project. In one end of a section protecting the castle on its south side, they planted lotus flowers, purely to add some color to the huge puddle. At the time I wrote about it, the quickly growing plants only took up a limited area, maybe 20% of the total surface area of the water.
Their work — or was it an experiment? — has reached a dramatic climax. The entire section, from one end to the other, is now crammed with lotus plants. Here’s what it looks like now.
In the morning, the view is especially spectacular! The flowers open wide to greet the day. They gently wave in the breeze. It’s a gratifying sight.
What is the lesson in this? Well, if your moat is looking drab and uninspiring, or it’s just time for a needed change, consider planting lotus flowers. The rewards are abundant. The flowers individually are extremely lovely. Collectively, they offer a carpet of smileys.
Plus you’ll be doing yourself and the world community a huge favor. You’ll set an admirable example for your neighbors, who will seethe with envy, as they look at their own drab, boring, lifeless moats, damning themselves for their negligence, and hopefully be inspired to get off their lazy asses and do their part in making the world a more beautiful place.
You’ll be improving your carbon footprint to carbon midwifing ratio. And as a related bonus, you’ll be pumping much-needed oxygen into the atmosphere. Look at the size of those leaves! Good grief, they’re like oxygen factories, and there’s nothing that can match a good oxygen high. Breathing is free and oxygen keeps the metabolic fires burning.
You’ll be driving away the turtles — arguably the strangest, if not the ugliest, creatures to inhabit the Earth — and the noisy, repetitious ducks with their incessant and non-sensical quack-quack-quacking. I do worry a bit about the ducks. Where will they go? Are we flirting with creating a homeless duck problem?
Yeah, you can scoff. But it doesn’t hurt to consider both sides of the equation when considering a tradeoff. It’s one thing to leave a human being stranded to fight the elements and eke out survival by dumpster diving and panhandling. But a duck is defenseless, incapable of getting a good-paying job, short on communication skills, small and vulnerable to trucks, attacks by large dogs and alligators, and predatory raids by hawks and vultures.
Friends, brothers and sisters, much as I love our lotus-filled moat, it would break my heart to start seeing these everywhere.
Okay . . . I got a little off track. Whatever. Life is complicated. The world is complex. Truth is, sometimes it’s a fool’s errand to try to sort it all out.
By the way, something just occurred to me, and I’ll close with this. The last time I had a major encounter with lotus plants was when I was rowing a boat on one of the lakes in Srinagar, India.
What Do Mermaids Eat? . . . Tanya & Chloe
Meet Tanya and Chloe. I met them on Bonaire Island in the Dutch Antilles. Very interesting pair. I think they were an item, whatever that means in the world of mermaids.
Not that it was in any way a problem for me. I have no LGBTQ+ issues.
Chloe tried to explain the way mermaids view the boy/girl thing we topsiders seem to be so pre-occupied with.
“You topsiders sure invest a lot of time and energy …”
Tanya interjected, “And money!”
“… yes, money too, in the whole male-female thing.”
I shrugged and probably looked puzzled. “It’s pretty fundamental for us.”
She swiveled the stool she was sitting in to face me, then stretched her body out. “What do you see? Can you tell if I’m male or female?”
“You have breasts.”
“So do sumo wrestlers. What about down below?”
She was right, of course. No obvious signs one way or other.
“And if you were to meet all two million or so of us, that’s what you’d see.”
“There’s two million mermaids in the world?”
“Give or take ten thousand or so. No one knows for sure. The oceans are enormous!”
“You’re really blowing my mind!”
Admittedly, that was a gross understatement. Every time I met a mermaid, my mind was getting blown. I’m surprised I can think at all.
Do you want to hear more about my unique adventures? How about having your own copy?
As I mentioned before, the ultimate deluxe full-color paperback is available for a limited time (until December 2nd) for 25% off the regular price . . . order it directly from the printer.
By the way, this stunning fantasy/travel/cookbook is also available as an ebook, in the format of your choice . . .
JUST DO IT!